In any communication situation, you are both the sender and the receiver, and when you’re communicating fairly, you expect certain things to happen as you play both roles. To help you communicate fairly, I’ve put together a list of my favorite communication rules to help you play—or communicate—fairly. Here they are:
3) When you talk to people, really take the time to listen and get what they’re trying to say to you. Most communication books will tell you that listening is something of a lost art. Nevertheless, fair communication means you listen to what’s being said to you. People love being heard.
a. How do you listen effectively? First, you acknowledge when someone is speaking to you. Have you ever known someone who just talks and talks? I have, and I found that if I acknowledge them by saying simple things like, “I got it,” or “I understand,” or even, “I heard you,” it lets them know that I really did hear what they were saying. This doesn’t mean that you agree with them; it just means that you have heard what they said.
b. Another great listening technique is to ask questions. I talk about that in the next rule, but just know that the process of asking questions demonstrates that you are listening and interested in the person you are speaking with, which reinforces that relationship. The more you focus on listening, the better you will get at it.
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